The Philosophy of the Donut
Heraclitus – You can’t eat the same donut twice. Plato – All donuts share in ideal ‘donut-ness.' Aristotle – A donut contains its donut-ness. Augustine – Donuts need grace to be fully donut. Descartes – A donut hole proves the existence of the donut. Locke – Donuts taste good to me. Hume – Donuts exist because I imagine donuts. Kant – A ‘donut’ = my total experience of donuts. Wollstonecraft – Women deserve donuts, too. Mill – Donuts are good if they make people happy. Kierkegaard – I have faith that donuts are delicious. Marx – Everybody deserves donuts. Nietzsche – Stop at nothing to get your donut. Saussure – Beignet/Krappen/Ciambella/Bunuelo = donut. Wittgenstein - Fried pastry, zero, parking lot spin, spare tire. Beauvoir – Patriarchy is responsible for the shape of the donut. Malcolm X - We should all be afforded the opportunity to get donuts…by any means necessary. Ayn Rand – A donut is a donut. S