Character Assassination

As many of you know, I have had problems with my character being maligned maliciously, most seriously in the last year.  I have said it many times through this dark time of my life; I have never experienced such pain, sadness, betrayal,  anguish, and sheer amazement at the lack of integrity and purposeful hurt.  Through it all, I have done my absolute best to be humble, righteous, polite, kind and loving.  I have done nothing to be ashamed of, as the LORD has enabled me to be honest and forthright.  I am thankful for a clear conscience.

Many friends, both near and far, have expressed their concern, love, hope and prayers for myself, and my close friends, as we have endured.  From the wise words of my husband and parents, to my beloved letterboxing community, to all my wonderful costuming friends, even friends of friends - they were all right.  You were all right...the writing was on the wall.  Thank you for your continual love, care and compassion.  But, most of all, thank you for your friendship.

This is the end; the final meeting, the final indictment, the final response.  In reality, the end probably came a long time ago, but I was in such denial, ever hoping that what was once mine hadn't slipped through my fingers.

A sad day, it is.

Character assassination is an attempt to tarnish a person's reputation. It may involve exaggeration or manipulation of facts to present an untrue picture of the targeted person. It is a form of defamation and can be a form of ad hominem argument. 

For living individuals targeted by character assassination attempts, this may result in being rejected by his community, family, or members of his or her living or work environment. Such acts are often difficult to reverse or rectify, and the process is likened to a literal assassination of a human life. The damage sustained can last a lifetime or, for historical figures, for many centuries after their death.   

In practice, character assassination may involve doublespeak, spreading of rumors, innuendo or deliberate misinformation on topics relating to the subject's morals, integrity, and reputation. It may involve spinning information that is technically true, but that is presented in a misleading manner or is presented without the necessary context.

To Whom it May Concern,

Upon receiving your response to our last meeting, I tried to be mindful of your intent. However, I have to respectfully disagree with your points. In fact, it is plain that issues have been fabricated to keep us out, as these indictments are complete lies.  (I have omitted any Scripture references, as we are all fully aware of our duties as believers.)

I absolutely cannot, and will not, admit to and/or repent for sin that I have not committed. I have repeatedly and humbly apologized for any hurt or embarrasment I may have caused with my words or actions. Once again, I would like to express my deep love and care for all involved; it is my hope and desire that you hear my words with the best of intent, despite how they may sound.

1. I adamantly insist that I have not committed slander in writing or in my speech. If you are able to provide proof, I'd be willing to look at evidence and possibly reconsider, in case I have missed something.

2. Similar to the first point, I have to truthfully state that I have not caused dissension and strife. Again, I'd like to see proof that substantiates your accusation.

3. In regard to respecting and submitting to those the LORD has put in authority, I clearly stated that I would most certainly be able to respect and honor as long as my best interests were considered.  I believe that is all anyone can ask and is in keeping with the teaching we have heard many times in regards to the marriage relationship and wives submitting to their husbands.

4. Concerning Star Wars, I don't believe it is under the jurisdiction of anyone to dictate how much or how little others participate in any given hobby. However, if it will put your minds at ease, we have been participating infrequently as of late, contrary to your repeated assertion of our 'deep involvement'.

5. It is rather insulting that some keep bringing up the issue of the friendship between Lisa and I, even after confirmation from Larry that he has no problems. Again, I don't think this is anyone's business but ours. If some would like to prove me wrong, again, I would be completely willing to re-assess. I am deeply sorry that some are unable to understand committed and loyal friendship.

Now, I would like to enumerate some issues of my own. I acknowledge that I have received a group apology for not dispatching certain duties as laid out in Scripture. However, as much as I want to, yet again, give a 'pass' for the lack of compassion towards me, I am limited to accept this stilted apology by how much my own sincere apologies have been refused.  The proof of this rejection is evidenced by the continual bringing up of the same issues over and over again, regardless of my efforts to meet (difficult) demands.

Further, this I have against you: as servants of the Most High, you are guilty of not showing love and compassion, even as we were being harshly judged and attacked for a sustained period of time (at least 2 years). This would be an overt sin of the greatest command of loving G-d and loving your neighbor as yourself. In addition, sin was committed by listening to lashon hara and slander against myself, even giving in to legalistic judgment and allowing (maybe encouraging?) harassment to continue. As a result of my trust and seeking counsel from my mentor, my words have been twisted and used against me in deceitful ways, so much so that I have struggled to defend myself. I was continually advised to let things ‘roll off’ instead of confronting the attackers; which I did until I couldn’t stand it any longer.

Moreover, I am offended greatly at the mocking of the Holy Spirit. It is just inexcusable to hear servants mocking those with the gift of discernment (or any spiritual gift, for that matter) and/or those who hear from our LORD in a way in which some are obviously limited. This is a call to repentance and personally would even go so far as to call it blasphemy. At the very least, it is disrespectful to fellow believers and grievous to the Holy Spirit.

It is more than obvious to me that there is something much bigger than the above issues going on here. Since it is clear that the voices of others have drown out all reason, perhaps money is the motivation. It is true that I don’t have much monetary value, and perhaps those with ‘bigger voices’ are more valuable, especially when donations are being actively sought. The other possibility that comes to mind is that there may be some secret inappropriate feelings towards me that have not been revealed, but needs to be kept silent. Best to have me out, if that is the case.

It is my firm belief that the enemy has definitely been at work, causing havoc and dissension. To blame us for this is absolutely absurd; if it were at our hands, things would have quieted down after our departure. It has been said that it is not the same as when we left, but worse. We would be walking into a fire, so to speak. It is my observation that the responsibility of this dissension and chaos lies at the feet of the ones who are not keeping the wolves at bay. The enemy has been allowed to come into the flock and has even dragged some off. Shameful.

In closing, I would like to thank you for your time, even though I know you have purposely drug this situation out for the past five months, undoubtedly hoping we would just give up and go away. I take no responsibility for this foot-dragging, as I have been more than timely, respectful and polite with all my responses, be it email, text or phone. I am sickened by the loss of time and relationship - you will never have a more staunch supporter, defender and loyal friend - of this I am convinced.

“We both know the truth. And, we both know the LORD is your defense.”
 I couldn’t agree more.

I will engage in no more communication regarding these issues, unless absolutely necessary. I find repeating myself tedious, five months of it even more so.

I pray that the LORD have mercy on us all.

The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. 

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.

~Paul to the Galatians