Ruminations from the Temple

When I was a child, I had a large mirror attached to my closet door in my bedroom. Since I spent a lot of time in my bedroom (obvious introvert), I apparently spent a lot of time looking at myself. Well, that is what I was told anyway. My parents decided to take the mirror out of my room, stating that they didn’t want me to be vain about my appearance. I have considered this my whole life…was I vain? Was my reflection an object of curiosity? Was I trying to develop a self-image? Since I was very small, the questions remain. Self-image is an interesting thing. For myself, the image I see in my mind’s eye seems to stay at right about age 20 – energetic, rather fearless, and ready to take on the world. I most certainly am not that person, but somehow that is who I expect to see in selfies. In my view, how we see ourselves is directly related to the reflection we see through others. How people react to me, or how they might describe me, becomes my reality and identity. Besides the ...

What is good? …that which has merit, is desirable, or pleasing? Who wants to be good, to have value? As a mostly-perfectionist, I want to be good. I am not sure why, I just have a drive to be good – good as this elusive, nebulous judgment that just cannot be nailed down. I want to be a good student. And by good, I mean to get the best marks every time – not just because, but because I put forth the effort required for high marks. I want to be a good friend. The type of friend that gives comfort, refreshment, and support. I want to be a good daughter, and always make my parents proud. I want to be a good mother, loving and supporting my children as they strive for value. I want to be good partner, meshing into the mythical oneness that is the pinnacle of human experience. I am constantly striving for good…for the good. In my appearance, I want to look as good as I possibly can. In my home, I want it to be as good as we can afford – as comfortable, tidy, and w...