July 5, 2009

Death of a Love Affair


Last night I dreamed a dream. Or was it a dream? It might have just been the ramblings of my mind in a state of complete freedom from boundaries.

I dreamed of a grand love affair. Of the players giving and receiving love, of laughter and acceptance. They were so happy...or was one of them just innocent or uninformed? Hopeful perhaps?

The players enjoyed music and worship, circles of chairs with thoughts and opinions, smiles and jokes. They danced and learned about each other and the Scripture that they held so dear. Oh, how they studied.

The players were close and took pride in that closeness. Perhaps that was their mistake. Did they start to take that privilege for granted?

Then, somehow, something began to happen. Little cracks, little lies. Secrets and differing ways of manipulation began to creep upon the players. Judgment laid hold of their hearts and they walked hand-in-hand with those thoughts of superiority. Sharing with just a few became more important than being part of the whole. Angry words were spoken and feelings were hurt.

The players no longer focused on what G-d had given them, but on those outside. Bringing in heresy and dark thoughts, dwelling on things that kill love and friendship.

And G-d turned His face away.

Limping along now, bad choices and popularity are the way. Wisdom is viewed only depending upon who speaks it. No more is the happy faces, the open sharing or love and acceptance that once was.

Then I woke up...or did I?

Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of withering, of tarnishing.
-Anais Nin 

3 comments:

Ari C'rona said...

I wish it was a dream, my friend... :o/

Baqash said...

I have known the kind of pain of which you speak.

Hendel D'bu said...

A friend sent me this quote and I thought it was appropriate to post it here...

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
~Kahlil Gibran