Ruminations from the Temple

My experience is my experience. You can take it or leave it, but it did happen to me personally. I watched it happen to others before my experience, and I'm watching it happen to good people after, as well. What am I talking about? Spiritual abuse. This issue is usually tied with negative cult groups. Consider the following explanation from wiki: Spiritual abuse is a serious form of abuse which occurs when a person in a cult-religious authority or a person with a unique spiritual practice misleads and maltreats another person in the name of a deity or church or in the mystery of any spiritual concept. Spiritual abuse often refers to an abuser using spiritual or cult-religious rank in taking advantage of the victim's spirituality (mentality and passion on spiritual matters) by putting the victim in a state of unquestioning obedience to an abusive authority. Spiritual abuse refers to the use of spiritual knowledge to deprive, torture, degrade, isolate, control, or even ...

trying to uphold Torah I've learned a few hard lessons being a part of a 'close-knit', believing community. Since I am one of many who have been cut-off from their communities/family as if they were dead, I'd like to share a few nuggets of advice to facilitate 'staying alive' and continuing within the bounds and bonds of organized religion. 1.   Don't blog or participate in any type of social internet media. Sharing your thoughts publicly is a definite no-no, and causes others to stumble as they read your statuses or blog posts with a critical eye, ever looking for things to use as ammunition. This is definitely your fault, no matter how well you write or how much you espouse righteous living. You could be writing great stuff, but believe me, it won't matter one iota. 2.   Don't serve selflessly. This will definitely make others look bad, especially if you are gifted in the area of service. Making others look bad, or feel guilty for their n...

fool , noun , a person lacking in judgment or prudence. No one likes to be considered a fool and it is understandable why.  Most would hesitate to label another as a fool for fear of being judged as such; this is prudent for sure.  However, at some point honesty must win the day and you have to admit, if only to yourself, that you may be dealing with a fool.  Have you ever been in this situation? For the believing soul, being labeled as a fool is a most grievous of indictments, cutting to the heart of motivation and character.  Consider the words of the psalmist, The fool says in his heart, "There is no G-d."  They are corrupt, they do abominable deeds, there is none who does good. ~Psalm 14, Psalm 53 It is a not a one-time event that would warrant the label of fool.  It would seem that it would be a habit, a way of life, a constant pattern of behavior that would lead to such a determination.  To act as if choices, actions and words are not kn...

As many of you know, I have had problems with my character being maligned maliciously, most seriously in the last year.  I have said it many times through this dark time of my life; I have never experienced such pain, sadness, betrayal,  anguish, and sheer amazement at the lack of integrity and purposeful hurt.  Through it all, I have done my absolute best to be humble, righteous, polite, kind and loving.  I have done nothing to be ashamed of, as the LORD has enabled me to be honest and forthright.  I am thankful for a clear conscience. Many friends, both near and far, have expressed their concern, love, hope and prayers for myself, and my close friends, as we have endured.  From the wise words of my husband and parents, to my beloved letterboxing community, to all my wonderful costuming friends, even friends of friends - they were all right.   You were all right ...the writing was on the wall.  Thank you for your continual love, care and compa...

I think we throw the word obsessive around a little too loosely.  Have you ever thought that, as well?  I am as guilty as the next person; if you will look in the sidebar, one of the very first things you see is the definition of this blog, "This blog is the place where the different facets of my life collide; my faith, my hobbies and my obsessions..." Do I have obsessions...really? I have never thought too much about the word until confronted with the concern that I am obsessive with some aspects of my life - so much so that my life priorities are out of line.  Honestly, I never even considered that some may consider constructing and wearing a Jedi costume to charity events obsessive behavior.  Fun, maybe.  Geeky, yes.  But obsessive?  I don't think so, but since it was brought up, I want to respectfully consider the possibility. I also enjoy reading up on the fictional "Jedi philosophy" and drawing parallels and contrasts to a life of faith....

When it comes to a place to worship, I suspect we all have a picture in our mind of how we would like to have things.  I call it 'my happy little world'.  It is the best of the best; in the realm of my imagination, this is how I want things to look...  I want a safe place, a community, for myself and my children, where we are accepted and respected as individuals.  Someplace where we feel, and are, needed and wanted. I want that place to be accepting of all types of families, not just 'whole' ones.  In my happy little world, couples and singles are valued equally and there is no judgment of small families or large ones.  In this world of my imagination, there is respect for both sexes.  Men are not better or smarter than women, and women don't hold higher intelligence or wits than men.  Gifts and talents are valued from all, regardless of gender, and are put to good use in this imaginary place.  This respectful attitude is something tha...

goodbye 2010... Alright, I've never been so happy to see a year be over.  Never.  And, I won't be making any grandiose resolutions for the coming year, either.  With the luck I've been having, I'd better just stick to makin' it through each day without a major meltdown. I'm grateful that the LORD gave me breath each day, that I had food to eat and a soft place to lay my head each night.  This year was pretty eventful, if nothing else.  My 45th year of life has been a roller coaster ride from...well, you know where. I'm grateful for faithful friends, especially my bestie Lisa.  She has been steadfast in her loyalty, love and acceptance through it all.   I will never be able to express my gratitude for the friends, the true treasures, that the LORD has given me. 2010 continued where 2009 left off caring for a dear friend who was suffering from colon cancer.  My sweet friend Rose left us in July.  I miss her still. I'm grateful and...

[Author's note:  Padawan has also written an interesting article on this very topic, as it has been heavy on our hearts as of late.  Find her article HERE .] For my own edification and to get things straight in my own head, I would like to ruminate a bit on lashon hara , which is gossip for all us non-Hebrew speakers. A good friend noted the wiki definition and I believe it is worthy of pondering.  "Lashon hara (Hebrew לשון הרע; "evil language/tongue") is the prohibition in Jewish Law (Torah) of telling gossip. Lashon hara differs from defamation in that its focus is on the use of true speech for a wrongful purpose , rather than falsehood and harm arising. By contrast, motzi shem ra (spreading a bad name) consists of untrue remarks, and is akin to slander or defamation. Speech is considered to be lashon hara if it says something negative about a person or party , is not previously known to the public , is not seriously intended to correct or improve a nega...

Sometimes things just don't turn out the way we would like.  Circumstances are created, decisions are made and hearts break before anyone even has time to make it stop. It is through these oh-so-difficult times that we learn the most.  I wish that weren't so.  But, even with knowing it is true, I'm hoping that I don't need to learn anything more for a while so I can recover from this, um...learning experience. I know that my character has been, and continues to be, called into question because of my hobbies.  I know of no way to resolve these things.  I also know that I can choose to listen to the LORD above all else, and He proves His care for me daily despite the opinions of men. I know it didn't have to be this way. I know that I enjoy yoga stretches.  Let me clarify; I do not believe that a position of your body determines what deity you are, or are not, worshiping.  I know it is the position of the heart, not the body, that is crucial in m...

When relationships die, do we ever really give up the ghost, or are we forever haunted by the spirits of relationships past?  Haunted.  Haunted by the familiar voices and well-rehearsed conversations echoing through thoughts, daydreams.  Taunted by triggers of memories, everyday sights and sounds mocking the wretched demise of what was held so dear. Dreams. Locked in blessed slumber we once again enjoy relationships damaged beyond repair in reality; in the shadowy dreams, though, we laugh, talk, make music just like when...  And waking is a tearing once again. Damaged. Hopes of future history...goals, plans...crumble as if the moisture was suddenly sucked away into a mist that easily floats on a breeze.  Grasping is futile, meaningless, as what is left is dusty remnants of what could have been. Memories. These are the true ghosts.  Ghosts have no evil intent, no agenda.  They just are, visiting heavily at some times, when we can't compl...

Influence may be the highest level of human skills. I'm thinkin' that there is two groups of people; those that strive for influence, and those that don't know they have it.  Would you agree with that? Since it would seem that I have a rather eager audience of readers to this blog, you could say I have some influence.  People read my words and ponder my thoughts; some even going so far as to be looking for things to criticize or condemn.  This is fascinating to me, as I never truly thought I was influential in such a way as to change the opinions of others, much less threaten anyone's position or power.  I am not a minister, motivational speaker or celebrity.  I'm not a celebrated scholar or even highly educated.  I am not an important personality of any successful company, business or volunteer organization.  In reality, I am a middle-aged, middle-class, stay-at-home mom trying to do the best I can to be a good friend and neighbor to those that co...

We make a decision. We make another. However, backward we cannot go. Time moves forward, bringing new discoveries, hard choices and valuable lessons. One may call them mistakes while another considers them experiences, dependent upon the point of view. Golden autumn moves forward into silvery-gray winter. It is only forward do the seasons march, hibernating for quiet, cold months before growth is ready to break forth into spring. And that is our hope, isn't it? That despite the sometimes difficult journey forward, we hold onto the encouraging words of friends and the eternal promise of our faith - not unlike waiting for the green growth of spring. And so, time continues to move on. Traditions are examined while the reality of true friendship is pondered yet again. Deep introspection leads to bold honesty and steadfast determination of who we are as we take the tentative steps forward with faith and courage, waiting on the Master to light the way.  As we marvel at the fl...

Associate yourself with people of good quality, for it is better to be alone than in bad company . ~Booker T. Washington If you spend yourself amongst those who by nature are not receptive to genuineness, you will not only waste the good you have received, but may lose yourself altogether in their influence. ~Charles Foltz Losing yourself.  An interesting concept.  To give in to the loudest voice or the selfish opinions of others when you think it may be wrong, leads to losing your ability to respect yourself.  Likewise, consenting to the rude behavior of others through silence demonstrates a serious lack of character (at least in my view).  If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything. ~Malcolm X Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it. ~Hardy D. Jackson To be true to yourself means to act in accordance with who you are and what you believe. And to be true to yourself means to be hone...

What if...after I heard of your great faith in the LORD Yeshua and for your love and commitment to the congregation of believers, that I never stopped giving thanks for you? What if...I prayed daily, or whenever I remembered throughout the day, that our LORD give you abundant wisdom and knowledge of Himself, even allowing you to understand Him more than you could even imagine? What if...I prayed that you know what is the hope of His purposes for you and all those around you? What if I did that instead of judging, condemning and confronting?  What if I built you up, encouraging you with friendship and love, instead of tearing you down or laying in wait to ambush?  How would that be viewed by the Almighty?  Would it make our relationship stronger?  Would it make our community stronger...better? "Therefore I also, after I heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, do not cease to give thanks for you, making mention of you in my pra...

According to Ben, Luke's uncle feared that Luke "might follow old Obi-Wan on some damn-fool idealistic crusade ..." DFIC. Sound familiar? I think it should be called the 'Superhero Syndrome'. The symptoms and behaviors should be easy to spot: hyper-observant behavior overly sensitive to injustice heart of compassion for those that are hurting protector and/or champion of the under-dog discerning of those in need avid listener responds with "I can help with that" or "I can make that happen" skilled in negotiation and diplomacy willing to confront, when necessary well familiar with all area hospitals able to change schedule at a moments notice These afflicted with the syndrome, the ones who think they are superheroes, are nice to have around...especially in a crisis. Unfortunately, they always tend to have enemies. I know, you wouldn't think so, but it's true. There is always someone, somewhere who is looking to g...

When I was young, I tried to keep a diary. I had a small diary complete with the lock and tiny key, in fact I probably had several. Many times I would try to record my thoughts, in fits and starts, only to rip out the pages deeming them nothing but trash. Are you really supposed to go back and read these things? I hated to...my own words always sounded so silly and useless. What was the point of that? However, with modern technology, anyone can keep a diary, or journal as is a more updated term, online and public. A diary...public? Doesn't anyone want to keep their private thoughts, well...private? Apparently not, at least it wouldn't seem so. Just google the term 'diary' and you will see pages and pages of both new and old personal writings available for public consumption. My favorite published diary, of course, is the Diary of Anne Frank. I'm sure she never figured her writings would be made public, but I for one am glad I had the chance to read her...